Ok that old bio is really quite old indeed, and since a lot has happened in the last couple years, we have decided to update it a bit with some relevant information.
First of all.. Yes, we mean it. Suck our balls.
Second of all.. We are all still alive and really more connected than we ever have been. We’re at that point when Raphael (The Ninja Turtle version, not ours) wakes up in the bath tab and Leo is like, “Hey, he’s awake! He wants some food! BRING SOME FOOD!”
So needless to say, we are now doing a lot of martial arts in a field out by an old abandoned house.
Next we’ll have s’mores around a blue camp fire and the rat that tells us what kind of music to play will start booking shows for us again.
All that said, we seriously are very excited that all five of us are alive. Judd beat his cancer. Raph’s collar bone is healed. Ryan is actually starting rehab.
And now, we are doing what we love to do again. Writing music.
Love forever, us.
Small Leaks Sink Ships…yes, the name is hard to pronounce, even for us. Raph has a beautiful baby daughter named Lily. Jim is a maintenance man. London works at Cornish Pasty Co. He makes pasties, but he’s not a real cook. He just puts things in the oven. Judd almost went pro at golfing but golfing got old. As a band we have tried growing plants three times now… they have all died, so now we are just composting until the next season. London is good at rapping. Ryan uses a cane after getting hit by a car. He stopped taking his medication. Jim eats meal replacement bars. Ryan is a gemini, you can tell and he hates that fact. London has a retarded cat with a stupid little head. Jim runs regularly with a headband. Kids laugh at him. He realizes that he’s the same guy he laughed at as a kid.
Judd quirkily smells his hands in a weird way for no reason,quite often. Rody London Rae Van received a ticket for 574 dollars in the state of Oregon. London insists on using the word fart. Judd can do the rubiks cube very quickly, (as quickly as 6 minutes.) Raph has a way of making photos that shock the human eye. London makes beats out of fruits and vegetables. Right now he is using onions. Movie rape scenes makes us uncomfortable, especially London, but he can’t explain why they are so fascinating to him. London is part indonesian. Raph is mexican. Raph and Ryan had large afros growing up. They both had things put in them. People put gum in Raph’s hair – popcorn in Ryan’s. London once kissed Judd on the mouth. They were drinking, so it’s ok. London probably wasn’t drunk. Judd’s favorite potatoes are the instant kind. Ryan and Judd like 84 cent thirst busters from AMPM (shortly after the initial posting of this, thirst buster prices at AMPM went up by nearly a dollar). London eats rabbit food. We like to switch instruments. Our name came from a fortune cookie. The fortune is based on a Ben Franklin statement. London and Judd watched a man with an eye-patch be thrown out of a bar by a large black man. None of us voted. Jim did. Jim refuses to use his mp3 player. Jim did P90x and lost tons of weight. We screenprint our own t-shirts and posters in our garage. We practice in our own basement. Judd has the stomach of a malnourished ethiopian child.
London loves bread. Raph loves sweets. Judd has to sleep with a fan on. London has to sleep naked. Jim quit smoking. London quit smoking. Raph and Ryan never smoked. Judd makes up for us. Ryan was in the Air Force. Judd needs 18 credits for a buisness degree. He chooses not to finish. London has 6 credits of college in the last 8 years. He averages .75 credits per year. Ryan is majoring in French. Judd and Ryan are learning how to read music. Ryan plays piano like the first time he touched it. Ryan loves They Might Be Giants. Jim hates Papa John (The owner). We all love Venezia’s pizza. We rock the vinyl in our living room. Jim doesn’t think vinyl is that special. London played quints. (No, not the fruit) Ryan has skydived 75 times. London has jumped tandem once. Ryan has his scuba license. Someone introduced us as Small Links Leaks Ships at a Hip Hop show we played. London can draw. Jim is good at skating. Ryan has metal in his spine. Judd lacks self control. We meditate at practice.
Small Leaks loves playing music more than any thing else.